The Life and Times of Radiator Springs
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: Crazy things happen in Radiator Springs...Ramone running from Flo? The King becoming the mayor? Mater opening a casino? And what's more  Lighting McQueen gets sued by Chick Hicks! The greatness and insanity of Cars, all rolled up into one!
1. Ramone the Hated?

Author's Note: And you all wondered where I went, eh? (laughs, and then sighs) Well, you're not really that happy. But, as much as I like the movie and game sequel, I decided to have a go at it - that's right, a Cars fanfic! And albiet, something that I sorta wanted to do a starting chapter with Ramone, you know...(chuckles, then stops) Just enjoy the story.

Disclaimer: What do I look like, Disney and Pixar? No, I never claimed that I owned the characters of Cars, but I certainly wished to. (laughs) Just kiddin'. I hate Cars. (gets flamed and killed by a lot of video-game characters) OWWW!!! All right, all right - be angry at me if you like, but it's not going to help...

* * *

In the small, peaceful comunittee known by everyone who travels through Route 66, the Mother Road, is Radiator Springs. But nothing exciting is happening in Radiator Springs...or is there?

"Ramone, you have been in there for HOURS, hon!" Flo shouted, "What's the matter with you?"

Ramone didn't reply.

"Ramone, I KNOW you can hear me!" Flo shouted, a bit angry.

Ramone still didn't reply.

"RAMONE, I'M NOT PLAYING AROUND!" Flo screamed, gasping as Lighting McQueen pulled up next to her.

"Flo, whoa there!" Lighting exclaimed, "You're never going to get Ramone out, unless you do this..." He tapped the door of Ramone's paint shop, and he shouted, "Yo, Ramone! There are some sweet, Motoramas!"

"Sweet Motoramas!?" Shouted Ramone from the inside, zooming out of his shop from the backway Doc installed for him. "Where are the Motoramas at?"

Flo angrilly glared at Lighting. "Way to go, McQueen."

Lighting chuckled nervously. "Ehehehehe...I didn't mean..." He sighed and turned to Ramone. "Sorry, Ramone, but...there aren't any Motoramas."

Ramone moaned. "No Motoramas!? Awwww...what a jib, man." He revealed his new paint color, which was yellow with green lighting bolts. "And I was going to show this off to the girls, too."

"There there, ramone," Flo cooed, comforting Ramone, "I still like you."

Ramone smiled. "Thanks, Flo. I'm kinda parched from all this excitement."

"What excitement?" Lighting said to himself, rolling his eyes.

Ramone glared straight at Lighting McQueen. "Did you just make a wise remark, man?"

Lighting laughed. "Oh ho, no I did not! I was just...erm..." He frowned, as did Ramone and Flo. Lighting sighed. "Look, I'm gonna go find The King. He said he'd meet me here sometime."

Flo smiled. "Well good luck, honey!" She and Ramone went towards Flo's Gas Station.

Lighting chuckled, before he zoomed off towards the Radiator Springs movie theatre, in hopes of seeing The King.

"So you were calling my name all morning long?" Ramone asked Flo, surprised. "Wow, man. That must have been a lot."

"Tell me, honey," Flo said, putting a gas pump into Ramone's gas tank.

"You know, if you actually came through the backdoor," Ramone began, taking up the oil and then continuing, "I coulda shown you the thing that's kept me and my cool paint job inside."

Flo's eyes perked up. "And that is..."

"WEHAHAHAHAHO!" Mater laughed, spinning around the gas station, with a white Nintendo Wii on his hook. "This thing is danggum fun! Yahoohoo!"

"MATER, I TOLD YOU NOT TO PLAY WITH MY WII!!" Ramone shouted angrily.

Flo gave Ramone a strange look. "Pardon me, but...did you just say what I think you said?"

Ramone gulped. "No, Flo! It's not what you thi-"

"If you're gonna talk with a motorcycle mouth, then you oughta be a motorcycle!" Flo said, taking the pump out of Ramone and started revving her engine.

Ramone meeped. "Uh oh. I better go..." He started zooming off down the street, with an enraged, screaming Flo following him.

* * *

Yoshizilla: Stupid, hilarious, and naughtical, yes? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! (shakes head) Whoops, pardon my brain, it's a bit zoned out. XP Well, that was Ramone's chapter, and now, I'm planning on doing the chapter for one of my favorite animated characters, The King. See ya soon in the next chapter! 


	2. The King Becomes Mayor?

Yoshizilla: Well, since you guys pretty much know the ol' disclaimer by now, I'm gonna cut you a break - NO DISCLAIMER! YAY!

Lighting McQueen: But now that we got your fully advised attention, we can continue the story!

Yoshizilla: McQueen, you're not suppose to help me out with the author notes.

Lighting McQueen: I'm not?

Yoshizilla: No.

Lighting McQueen: ...You jerk! (runs me over)

Yoshizilla: OWWWW!! Fine, fine! I'll let you do this in the next chapter...happy?

Lighting McQueen: (smirks) Maybe, but I'd be more happy if I could watch the new season of Survivor tonight.

Yoshizilla: (slaps forehead and shakes head for several, sad seconds; looks at computer screen) All right, folks - just enjoy the chapter. I can honestly say that The King will get his chance. The King WILL get his chance.

* * *

We can see the outskirts of Radiator Springs in the background, with two, small yet visible, objects seen on the ground. Later, it is revaled that there are a red object and a blue object. It's revealed to be Lighting McQueen and The King.

"McQueen, long time, long see," The King said, wearing a McDOnald's employee outfit.

Lighting smiled. "Gee, thanks King! I really-" He stopped smiling when he noticed the McDonald's employee outfit. "Uhhhh...King, what are you WEARING?"

The King laughed. "Oh, didn't I tell you? I work at McDonald's now. I wanted a break from racing, so I could resort to serving the customers!"

Lighting gasped. "But King! Is this how you're going to leave your glory, racing days of Dinoco in the past? Is it really?"

The King frowned. "Well...I was going to work at Burger King or Wendy's instead, but a couple of friends of mine said that they pay less than McDonald's." He whispered into Lighting's rear-view mirror (think of this as his 'ear'). "Plus, the food at Burger King and Wendy's suck."

Lighting nodded in agreement. "Good point, King." He backed up, facing The King directly. "So, how about havin' a little race?"

The King shook his head. "I can't, McQueen - I have to pick up some of Fillmore's organic fuel for my wife."

Lighting started begging. "But come on, King! This could be a great warm-up for me before the next season starts! And point taken, you could use a bit of more excitement in your life." He grinned.

The King sighed, shaking his head. "Sorry, McQueen, but I no longer have any interests in racing, anymore." He headed off to Radiator Springs.

Lighting sighed. "Well, I guess this could be for the better." The red hot-rod racer said to himself, as he started back towards Radiator Springs. "I hope..."

* * *

Bugle calls are heard, followed by electric guitar.

A gruff, military voice (Sarge) is heard. "Will you turn that disrespectful junk off!"

A slightly calmer voice (Fillmore) replies, "Respect the classics, man! It's Hendrix!"

Lizzie sighed, watching Sarge and Fillmore fight as usual. "It's times like these that I wish Stanley were here. We use to always fight with each other," She said to herself.

"For the last time, I will not tolerate the American Pledge interrupted by your crazy music!" Sarge shouted back at Fillmore.

"Bro, there's nothing wrong with us hippies. Make love and peace, not war." Fillmore replied to Sarge.

It is at this time that The King drives up to Fillmore. "Excuse me, sir, but do you have any organic fuel?"

Both Fillmore and Sarge looked strangely at The King.

"What kind of prancy, worn-down outfit is that?" Sarge pointed at The King's McDonald's employee outfit.

The King sighed. "Look, I work at McDonald's now. I'm no longer into racing. But now-" He turned to Fillmore. "-About that organic fuel..."

Fillmore backed away. "Whoooa, dude. I don't give my special organic fuel to anyone, you know. Especially to cars who wear those terrible outfits..."

The King rolled his eyes. "I'm suppose to work in this outfit, it's not like I wanted to wear thi-"

"My, oh my!" Lizzie exclaimed, looking at The King from the front and back. "You, young man, would be a great mayor for Radiator Springs?"

The King, Fillmore, and even Sarge dropped their jaws in disbelief. "Mayor!?" The three different cars exclaimed in unison.

Lizzie looked at the ground. "Well, there's nothing wrong with having a guy who can help our town a bit more, is there?"

Sarge nodded. "No, there isn't!" He drove up next to The King. "Let's make this punk mayor!"

Fillmore also drove up, next to The King on the other side. "Bro, you'd make the perfect leader over our bustling town!"

The King moaned. "But I just want organic fuel for my wife!" He shouted, but apparantely, the other cars couldn't understand him, and they were now throwing confetti and celebrating with their new 'mayor'.

* * *

Yoshizilla: Pretty hectic, no? Well, possibly yes, with The King unquestionably becoming mayor. And working at McDonald's? Yeah, that's a shocker, huh? Now that I leave you with a good cliffhanger, I shall think up another good idea on what characters I should do next. Thanks for reading, neighborinos! 


End file.
